Aniexty Attacks

Having an Anxiety Attack

Recently I had a couple of anxiety (panic attacks).  But I have bloody survived what they threw my way.

One day last week, I had my second anxiety attack in 2 months. I was very disappointment and upset. All I did was try and manage it. When I had my first one a couple of weeks ago I was so scared and didn't know what was going on, I was much better the second time around. They do take a lot out of you and both times it was nearly in the middle of the next day when I felt normal again. I would prefer not to have them, as after all, who likes to be blindsided by an uncontrollable heart beat.

My anxiety attack made me feel I was in danger. What terrifies me even more is that what I'm scared of, I cannot run from and like last time I didn't even know what it was about. At least with a physical threat you can try and quickly spot an escape route. When it's your mind, where can you go? There isn't a panic room for you to hide out in until the threat is gone.

It took a lot of energy to get through both my anxiety attacks. Have you ever been so ill and fragile that you feel you could be pushed over by the slightest gust of wind? That's what I feel like in the aftermath of an anxiety attack. They also leave me feeling rather numb. In a single moment, months of hard work is unraveled and I can’t see a future without being harassed by mental health issues or that I will never achieve my goals in life. It's like a war I can't win, no matter how hard I try. As you can appreciate, it’s pretty disheartening. I really am trying to take each day as it comes and not focus on the future and what it might look like.

Other News

I have booked another face to face counselling session with a CBT counsellor at the end of month!

I just had a day when I had no energy. It lasted all day. In the evening I went for a walk and I didn't give me the engery I needed. I feel back to normal self now but never found out why I felt like that!